shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
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