i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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