Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
