You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
