5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
