So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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