Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
