NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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