with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
