I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize