she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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