I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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