You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
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