Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
