I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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