How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize