How'd it feel making her break her religion?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I have aggressive nipples.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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