As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize