Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize