dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
She bit a glass in half.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
