is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
