My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
