just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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