We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
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We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
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I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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