everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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