Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
