wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
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