YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
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