Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
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