dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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