i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
