Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
