Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Randomize