He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Randomize
