he puts the penis in happiness.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
we should paint friendship bongs
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