this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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