i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
