Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
