shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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