I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
