p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
