i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
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