he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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