Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that

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(850): View more from Florida

I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?

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(561): View more from Florida

I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.

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(410): View more from Maryland

Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.

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(407): View more from Florida

Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.

(1-407): View more from Florida

That's horrible but hilarious

(407): View more from Florida

I'm going to miss college.

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(+61): View more from Australia

I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?

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