You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
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Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
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also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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