We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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