it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize