I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
im drinking this country out of the recession.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I think I am morally bankrupt
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
