I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
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