I hope mine doesn't look like that
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize